Gentleness Is a Strength: Ellie Laks on The Gentle Barn, Healing Animals, and Helping Humans Heal

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Today's episode is a celebration of gentleness, healing, and the extraordinary

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bond between humans and animals.

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We're joined by Ellie Laks, the founder

of The Gentle Barn, a sanctuary known

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worldwide for its rescued animals, cow hug

therapy, and the life-changing experiences

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it offers to visitors of all ages.

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Ellie's new Macmillan picture

book, Gentle, gorgeously

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illustrated by Jennifer A.

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Bell, tells the true story of John

Lewis, a sick baby calf she rescued

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and raised inside her home, who grew

into a strong, loving cow that now

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comforts guests with his calm presence.

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Ellie reminds us that gentleness isn't

a weakness, it's a strength, and today

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she's here to show us how rescued animals

can help children and adults navigate big

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feelings, fear, loneliness, and change

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Hi, Ellie.

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Welcome to the show.

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Ellie: Hi.

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Thank you for having me.

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DIxie: Sure.

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I'm excited to learn

about The Gentle Barn.

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I'm hoping that we can discuss the idea of

being gentle, of course 'cause you do have

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your new book that just came out Gentle.

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And so- Yeah … I would like

to start at the beginning.

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The Gentle Barn is beloved across

the country, and your work has

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been featured everywhere, NBC,

local LA news, national outlets.

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But before all of that,

it started with you.

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Can you take us back to that moment

you knew that you needed to create

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a place like The Gentle Barn?

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What was the spark?

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Ellie: So the spark happened very early

in childhood when I was seven years old.

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And I spent my early years playing

in the lakes and woods by my house,

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playing with the bunny rabbits, the

turtles, the ducks, the butterflies.

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They were my friends, and I felt

very safe in nature with animals.

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I felt like they truly saw who I was.

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And what I noticed was that the

people around me didn't love

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animals the way that I did.

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Sure, yeah, it's nice to pet a puppy

dog, but it's-- they didn't really

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hear them and see them quite the

way that I did, and it confused me.

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And so I remember saying when I was very

young that when I grew up, I was gonna

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have a big place full of animals and

show the world how beautiful they are.

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And I thought that if I could grow up

and just bring all the broken, hurting,

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lonely, tired animals home to me,

restore them to health, and then we would

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work together to help hurting humans.

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And that was my little dream at seven.

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And life took me through its

twists and turns, and I went

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through a lot since seven to when

I finally started The Gentle Barn.

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But the idea of The

Gentle Barn never left me.

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It was something that I dreamed

of as I drifted off to sleep.

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It was something that I doodled on

pads of paper while I was working.

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And I didn't know exactly how

to do it, so it, it's remained a

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dream until twenty-seven years ago.

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I was doing an errand in the San

Fernando Valley, and I discovered a

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petting zoo I had never seen before.

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And very morbidly curious,

why did it smell funny?

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Why were there so many people there?

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Why did it feel dark?

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So I found myself pulling over

and going into that petting

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zoo, and what I discovered

there absolutely broke my heart.

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Not only was it full of animals that were

suffering deeply, but it was also full

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of humans that literally could not see

the suffering right in front of them.

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They completely ignored

it, and it blew me away.

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So I ended up running for the door,

and blocking the exit was a very old

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goat that looked like she was gonna

die any second, and she asked me for

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help, and I said that I would help her.

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So I found the owner and said,

"Hey, can I have that goat?"

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And she said, "No."

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And I said can I n-- can I buy her?"

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And she said, "No."

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And I said I'm just gonna

stay here till you say yes."

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And I stayed there for twelve days.

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And finally, on the 13th day,

she let me have the goat.

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I brought her home.

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I got a mobile vet to come and remove

her tumors, trim her overgrown toenails,

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and teach me how to massage her

deformed legs so she could walk again.

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And in a few months, this goat was

running and bouncing happily all over

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my backyard, and it was the single

greatest feeling I've ever had in my life.

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I knew it was what I was born

to do, and I had to do it more.

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So I went back to the petting zoo

and brought a whole bunch more of

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dying animals home, and shortly

realized I had started my dream.

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So that was 27 years ago.

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DIxie: Wow, that's a beautiful story, too.

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I can tell that you're quite empathetic.

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Do you feel that you sense what the

animals are feeling or intuitively

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know how these animals feel?

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Ellie: Yeah, ever since I was…

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ever since I can remember.

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I don't remember a time in my

life that I wasn't this way.

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./ I'm very intuitively connected to animals.

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When I was a very small child, I would

hear orphaned or injured animals literally

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call me from the woods, and I would go

out and find them and bring them home.

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I could always…

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When I was at friends' houses

their dog would be like,

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"Hey, my water bowl's empty.

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Can you help me out?"

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Or, "Hey, I really gotta pee.

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Can you let me out?"

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And it just…

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I always felt very intuitively

connected to what animals were

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saying, what they needed and wanted.

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DIxie: Yeah, I definitely understand that.

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I do believe there truly are

some of us that can pick up on

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that, and we know what they need.

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They come to us.

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Just like if you ever see, I

know with me it's like the cats

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will find us when they need help.

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And it's like they know.

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They know who to go to

when they need help.

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Ellie: Absolutely.

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Absolutely, and they send their friends.

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They're like, "Hey, go to that house.

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She'll help you."

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It gets around, for sure.

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DIxie: Yeah.

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That's absolutely 100% true.

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It's like you get- … a big sign

above your house, "Go to that place."

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Let's talk about John Lewis.

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His story is the heart of

your new picture book, Gentle.

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How did you first meet him, and

what made you realize that he needed

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more than traditional rescue care?

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Ellie: So I wanna say that The Gentle

Barn has existed for the last 27 years,

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that we have two locations, one in Los

Angeles and one in Nashville, Tennessee.

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We've rescued thousands of animals

over the years, and rescuing John

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Lewis, I think, was one of the

most extraordinary and remarkable

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rescues that we've ever done.

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We found him inside a slaughterhouse.

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One of the remarkable things that my

partner Jay does, he's also the CEO

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and co-founder of The Gentle Barn,

he establishes amazing relationships

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with owners of stockyards, auction

houses, and slaughterhouses so that

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when someone is born there or too sick

to stand, the relationship will warrant

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him to be able to go and get that

animal instead of them being destroyed.

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And so we were told about a calf that

was born inside a slaughterhouse, and

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we were able to save his life and bring

him home to The Gentle Barn, but he

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was so incredibly sick with pneumonia

that we weren't able to lower his

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temperature in the 106-degree LA weather.

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And so Jay and I looked at each

other and we're like we have

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to move him into our house."

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And so just like that, we scooped

him up, moved him into our house.

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I moved downstairs to become

his mom, to be with him 24/7.

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My dog Sky came with me, and the three

of us spent literally every day and

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every night for nine months together.

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And because of the love and the

gentleness and the friendship, he

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recovered and of course, great vet care.

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He recovered, and he made it.

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But he lived in the house for nine months.

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I bottle-fed him for

three and a half years.

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He's best friends with my dog Sky.

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He comes when I call him.

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We walk him on a leash.

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He sleeps on a dog bed.

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It was like having a cow-looking dog

in our house, and it was amazing to

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really see, like, when raised like

a dog, they really are like dogs.

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DIxie: Yeah, , that is a very

powerful image, a baby calf living

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indoors being nurtured like a child.

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When you said you were up 24/7

with him were you having to do

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intensive feeding sessions with

him to make sure that he was okay?

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Ellie: Yeah, so we worked very closely

with the veterinarian who had me checking

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his temperature three times a day.

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We did nebulizer treatments on him

three times a day to try to break

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up all the phlegm in his lungs.

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M- Jay built a homemade oxygen tent for

him that we sat in together twice a day

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so that oxygen could help heal his lungs.

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He got Sun Chlorella algae superfood

to boost his immune system.

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He got anti-inflammatories

and medications from the vet.

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I did energy healing sessions on him.

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And it was like with anybody you take

two steps forward, one step back.

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There would be days where we

felt so hopeful "Oh my God,

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he's really gonna make it."

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And then the next day he would come

crashing down with an even higher

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fever, and we would be deathly afraid

that he was not going to make it.

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But slowly he recovered.

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And the sweetest thing about having

John Lewis in my house is I would give

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him a bottle, and then he would go to

the bathroom, and I'd clean it up, and

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then he'd play a little bit, and then

he'd settle back down, and I would

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spoon him, and Sky would lay with us,

and all three of us would fall asleep.

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And then two hours later, I would wake

up with John Lewis' face in my face with

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his sweet, warm baby breath in my nose,

basically saying, "Mom, I'm hungry again."

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And we would wake up and

do it all over again.

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DIxie: Wow, that's amazing.

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That's such dedication.

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I understand that too.

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I know a lot of people might think

that you're crazy for doing that,

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but, sometimes that's what you

have to do for these little things.

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Ellie: Absolutely.

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And if you're in cat rescue,

I know you've been up many

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nights bottle-feeding kittens.

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And that's no small task 'cause they

also have to be fed every two hours.

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So it looks like we're

made from the same cloth.

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DIxie: Yeah definitely.

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I definitely understand what

you're saying 100% because I've

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been there, just not with a cow.

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Now,, that sounds- … amazing, though.

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Ellie: Much bigger poops.

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DIxie: He's a gentle adult cow

who gives hugs to visitors.

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What does it feel to see

him comforting people after

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everything that he went through?

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Ellie: It was extraordinary 'cause

we rescued him during the pandemic,

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and when we finally got to reopen

our doors watching him heal people

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was the most incredible thing.

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We had teenagers in foster care that

were isolated, lonely, suicidal.

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The only thing that made them

wanna live was John Lewis and the

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other animals at the Gentle Barn.

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We had people that lost children.

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We had people that lost parents.

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We had people that had been

through unspeakable trauma.

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We had people that had suffered really

bad illnesses like cancer and heart

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disease during the pandemic and were

completely alone in the hospital and

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promised themselves that when they

recovered, if they recovered, that they

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would come and meet John Lewis because

while at the hospital, they followed his

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journey through our social media channels.

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And so they got to know him and see his

resilience, and they promised themselves

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that if they made it, they would reward

themselves with a trip to the Gentle

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Barn to meet John Lewis in person.

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And he wrapped his neck around them.

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He held them.

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They cried onto his shoulder.

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It was just so beautiful to see

this guy who almost died just be

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so loving and nurturing to people

that were suffering themselves.

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DIxie: Yeah, that's truly beautiful.

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What other animals do you

have at the Gentle Barn?

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Ellie: We are home to horses, donkeys,

cows, pigs, sheep, goats, chickens,

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turkeys, peacocks, llamas, alpacas,

a guinea fowl, a parrot, and dogs.

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And we rescue all of our animals from

having nowhere else to go, who will

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otherwise be euthanized and slaughtered.

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And we bring them in, and they're

all compromised physically and

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emotionally, and we work tirelessly

until they're healed and happy and

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integrated with their flocks and herds.

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And then if they wanna stay to

themselves, they're welcome to.

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And if they ever want to partner

with us to heal people hurting, then

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they can participate in our programs.

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It's up to them.

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DIxie: I'd like to talk a little

bit now about your book, Gentle.

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So your book is beautifully

illustrated by Jennifer A.

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Bell, and when you saw the artwork for

the first time, what was your reaction?

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Ellie: It was exciting 'cause I

had never written a picture book

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before, and the publisher sent me

dozens of artists to choose from,

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and they were all very talented and

very beautiful in their own right.

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But, I'd see one and say that's nice.

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Let's see the next one.

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Eh, let's see the next one."

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I landed on Jennifer A.

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Bell's work, and I immediately

said, "That's the one."

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She-- There's something, ah, so

soft and whimsical and gentle

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about the way she illustrates.

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The colors are vivid.

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The pictures are real enough to

really engage but whimsical enough to

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immerse you in that fairy tale, and

I knew she was the one immediately.

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DIxie: The book's message is

that gentleness is a strength.

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It feels so timely.

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Why was that the theme that you

wanted children to take away?

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Ellie: I look at John

Lewis' story as a metaphor.

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He was born inside a slaughterhouse,

one of the darkest places on Earth.

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He came to the gentle barn and surrounded

by gentle vet care, gentle best friends,

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gentle other animals, gentle nurturing.

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He made it.

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And if you look out into the world

today, there's a lot of darkness.

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There's a lot of suffering,

a lot of depression, anxiety.

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We're not in good shape.

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And that same gentleness that

resuscitated Lewis can breathe love

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and life back into our beautiful planet

and into our beautiful world if we

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surround it with the same gentleness.

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And so

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gentleness is John Lewis' story, but

it's also a call to action, if you

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will, to start the conversation inside

families with children in communities

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to talk about what being gentle means

so that we can have more gentleness to

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heal the darkness of our world today.

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DIxie: Yeah, definitely, 'cause I do think

that a lot of people look at gentleness

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as more so of a weakness when it's not.

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I look at it as a strength as well, as

it's developing compassion and empathy

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Ellie: I think it's our greatest strength.

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I think it's a matter of life or death.

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I, we continue going with this violence

and destruction and apathy, it just

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keeps getting worse and worse, but

when we turn it around with gentleness.

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And little acts.

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I'm not talking about huge heroic acts.

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I'm talking about watering a wilted plant,

calling for help when there's s- human or

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animal that's hungry, or calling a rescue

group when there's an animal in trouble

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being someone's first friend or giving

a stranger a smile when they look sad.

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There's so many heroic, tiny little

acts that we all can do right where we

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are that can create more gentleness for

everyone around us, and if we all practice

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that, it will be our biggest strength

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DIxie: Picture books often become a

part of bedtime routines, classroom

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libraries therapy sessions.

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Where do you imagine "Gentle" being read?

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Ellie: Honestly, I imagine

it being read everywhere.

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Unlike the typical picture

book, I really think that this

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is amazing for kids, right?

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Classrooms, libraries, teachers, parents

reading to their kids, early readers

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practicing reading with "Gentle" because

it's so repetitive and so sing-songy.

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It's really easy to get into

a rhythm and practice reading.

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But I also have experienced many

adults that buy the book for themselves

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to either read to the animals

in their home or just read it to

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themselves, almost like a meditation.

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It's-- Every sentence starts with the

word gentle, and after a rough day

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at work or just having a tough time

or feeling lonely, when we read the

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book "Gentle" with those beautiful

illustrations, we are flooded with the

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belief that gentleness exists, and it

makes us feel gentle inside ourselves.

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And so it's a lovely thing for anyone

of any age to read before going to bed

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or when they wake up in the morning or

just when they need a little pick-me-up.

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It's beautifully illustrated.

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Jennifer Atheyld did such a good job.

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DIxie: Since we're heading into

back-to-school season, which can be very

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overwhelming for kids new classrooms,

new friends, new expectations, why

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is this the perfect moment to teach

children what it means to be gentle?

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Ellie: This is the perfect moment

to teach children about being gentle

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because they, exactly like you said,

they're going into new classrooms.

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And reminding children to be gentle

to other classmates is so important.

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Y- sh- I picture a child going maybe

to kindergarten or first grade for the

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very first time to a new school and not

knowing many people, and bringing Gentle

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with them, and sharing it with their

classmates, sharing it with their teacher,

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everybody gathering around and reading it.

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It's a way to make friends, it's a way

to start conversations, it's a way to

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contribute, and it's a way to remind

everyone to be gentle because everyone

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struggles with one thing or another.

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And when we practice

gentleness, it connects us.

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DIxie: And since you mentioned people

struggling, so we have kids who struggle

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often with big feelings, anxiety,

frustration, sensory overload, and

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of course, this goes for adults too.

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Why do animals often help them open up

in ways that humans sometimes can't?

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Ellie: I think animals obviously

are unconditionally loving, so we

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can be ourselves, and we can show

up the way that we show up and

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know that they are not judging us.

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They are accepting us exactly as we are.

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And it makes us feel like the

best versions of ourselves

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when we're near animals.

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We feel kind, we feel gentle,

we feel wanted and needed.

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We feel valuable.

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I know that I feel like the best

version of myself when I'm next

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to an animal, and I think it does

the same thing for other people.

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And so learning about a calf that lived in

a house that was best friends with a dog,

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that drank from a bottle for three and a

half years, that lived in a barnyard with

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pigs and chickens and goats and sheep, who

doesn't wanna gather around to do that?

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DIxie: Yeah.

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I'm gonna say it

definitely makes you smile.

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As soon as you hear that,

You can just imagine it.

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You could picture it.

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Without even- Yeah … seeing

anything, you can just picture that.

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The Gentle Barn has been featured in

some incredible stories lately: cow

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therapy helping people find peace,

turkeys offering comfort, rescues

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helping humans heal from trauma.

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When you see these stories resonate so

widely, what does that tell you about

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what people are craving right now?

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Ellie: Yeah, it go back, goes

back to my previous statement.

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I think that people are

really having a hard time.

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I don't think that we've even

scratched the surface of how

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the pandemic affected all of us.

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And then there's wildfires and

hurricanes and floods and war.

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There's a lot going on.

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I don't think the country has ever

been this divided politically,

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economically, socially.

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There are so many things to worry about.

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We are all stressed out of our

minds for one reason or another.

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So I think we need comfort.

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We need animal angels around us to comfort

us, to make us feel wanted and needed to

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soften the edges of our harsh lives and

bring some love and nurturing, and I think

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people are seeking that now more than ever

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So for listeners- And we

see that- Oh, I'm sorry.

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Go ahead.

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Sorry.

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Sorry.

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And we see that at the Gentle Barn when

people come when we're open to the public

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on Sundays, or people come for private

tours or cow hug therapy sessions.

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We see those numbers increase, and

we see people really turning to

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these animals for not just love and

nurturing, but for actual healing.

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DIxie: For listeners who want to

experience this firsthand, what can

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families expect when they visit,

and how do they find out about you?

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Ellie: So people can go to gentlebarn.org

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and either click Visit or Programs, and

they can come on an open to the public

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Sunday for a tour, a field trip, or enroll

in one of our therapeutic pro- programs.

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And they can hug cows, cuddle turkeys,

give pigs tummy rubs, hold chickens,

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pet goats and sheep, hear their stories

of resilience, and leave feeling more

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hopeful, more open and stronger, more

connected to what really matters.

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These animals do extraordinary work,

reaching in and just making us feel

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better without the need to explain

or talk or go into our trauma.

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It's something that people feel.

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It's not something they have

to work towards or talk about.

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The hu-- the cows will literally wrap

their necks around people, and people can

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meditate with these cows and rest their

faces on them and close their eyes or

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hold a little chicken and feel empathy.

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It's just beautiful.

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W- we have hundreds and hundreds of guests

that come to see us on our open to the

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public Sundays at both our locations, and

a large majority of them call the Gentle

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Barn their, quote-unquote, "church,"

where they come for that dose of hope and

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healing that they can't get anywhere else.

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DIxie: Yeah, that's beautiful.

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It sounds like an amazing

experience for sure.

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Ellie- Yeah … thank you for

sharing your heart and your work.

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Gentle, the book, just came out on

August 11th, and it's truly a beautiful

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reminder that compassion is a strength.

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Where can listeners

find out about the book?

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Ellie: People can get a copy of

Gentle anywhere books are sold.

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It's on Amazon.

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It's at Barnes & Noble.

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They can get a signed

copy at gentlebarn.org.

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And I would be thrilled to share

John Lewis's story with everyone.

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DIxie: I'm gonna link

everything in the show notes.

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And Ellie, thank you so

much for being here today.

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Ellie: Thank you so much for having me.

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It was really lovely being with you.